Diabetes, Yikes!?!

Dear Flabby,

My mom just came up to visit and told me she got some blood test results back. She has diabetes and has to start taking medication for it. Keep in mind 6 months ago her doctor told her she was borderline diabetic and that if she just lost weight she could avoid a lot of potential health problems. I love my mom but I wish she would have picked the broccoli over eating a gallon of ice cream at a time. How ironic that the day I start this blog, I get this news. Everything happens for a reason doesnt it Flabby?!

Dear Flabby??

So I decided I wanted to have fun with Dear Flabby, so if you see me write to myself, it is mostly a joke or me being goofy. This is sort of like a diary (only anyone in the world can read it) and writing it makes me feel better. In fact if you feel so inclined, you can write Dear Flabby too! Might make you feel better.

Yummy Alcohol

Dear Flabby,

Why do I love alcohol so much? It isnt even all that great, yet for some reason I have to have a glass of wine to relax at night. I mean, its not like Im an alcoholic, I dont attend meetings.

Seriously though, I know that you arent supposed to drink when you want to lose weight,so why is it I have no self-control? Oh wait, I have no self-control with eating either.

Thanks for listening Flabby, you're the greatest!

Welcome and Hello!

10/31/2008~~most recent picture I have (with DD2)

So the buzz lately has been the weight Oprah, Queen of the Universe" recently put on. In fact, she hit the dreaded 2-0-0. Well, she isn't the only one. Which brings me here. I was always pretty thin, curvy but thin. In fact, after my first child was born, I was smaller than ever and wore a size 2. Then when he was about 3 or so my weight started fluctuating so I began working out every single day and watching everything I ate. I stopped drinking alcohol, which was tough! (I'm a wino, what can I say). From that time until my daughter was born in 2003 I went up and down between 140 pounds and 180 pounds. After dd was born in '03 I was at my highest and during my pregnancy I hit the dreaded 2-0-0. I was sad and depressed and couldnt believe how I looked. After about 6 months I started working out again and lost about 30 pounds and while I wasnt at my ideal, I was much happier. Then in 06 I found out I was pregnant with dd numero dos! And once I found that out all I did was eat. I thought my OB was going to kill me. In Feb. 07 alone I gained 10 pounds. She only wanted me to gain 20 for the whole pregnancy. Well, I ended up gaining about 70 or so. DD2 is now almost a year and a half and while I have lost almost 1/2 of the baby weight I still have a ways to go and I just haven't been motivated to do it. I guess it seems like there is so much that it is just overwhelming and seems impossible.

I am sick of being lazy, I am sick of wanting to throw up when I look in the mirror before I jump in the shower, I am sick of being tired all the time, I am sick of feeling guilty every time I eat something. So, please come along with me on my journey. Hold me accountable, cheer me on, and if you are in the same place as I am, work on this with me. Women, especially moms, cheat themselves. We are always concerned about other people and meeting their needs and making sure they are taken care of. We put ourselves last and that is not healthy!

I know there a lot of weight loss blogs out there but I would like to think mine is a little different. My goal is to post everyday. Weigh-ins will be Friday morning and I havent decided if I am posting inches or not. Maybe later on. I dont think I am that brave yet! :) And while I know there is Sparks people and things like that where you can journal what you eat and drink, I am going to do that here. I am sure there will be a lot of whining and complaining too. BUT, that's a good thing because I think I overeat when I am stressed out. So maybe if I get it out here, I wont shove it down my throat.

Addictions come in many forms. It may be cocaine, heroin, vicodin, alcohol, tobacco...but some addictions are not as recognizable, like food and shopping and gambling. Food is my drug and since there isn't a rehab for loving Burger King I guess I just have to do it on my own. So wish me luck!